I first met you hanging knickers on the line

[venta]

Help!

On Saturday I am due to attend a hen party for a university friend. I have been instructed that, among other things, I must take a pair of pants for her.

The actually rather innocuous explanation for this is that they are to be a present. Everyone is to provide a pair, and "the pants should typify the giver, she has to guess who they are from".

So far so good... but what on earth style of pants would typify me? Words one might associate with desirable lingerie don't seem to apply to me very well. I have never been called slinky or silky, and would baulk alarmingly at being called frilly. "Scruffy, black, lots of pockets" doesn't really sound like a great spec. for a pair of knickers, even assuming I could find a supplier of such things.

So, o LJ, what sort of pants might remind you of me ?

Comments

[leathellin.livejournal.com]

In a word - grey :-)

Or possibly a bit more helpfully I got some grey and black stripy things from M&S recently that aren't too lacy or frilly or those many other things you are not.
They're mostly like these except with less pink and with better stripes. - http://tinyurl.com/3x8myt

Or of course there's always the more stylish options http://tinyurl.com/38sfzn :-) and... http://tinyurl.com/2ou9ty

I don't think any of the non-M&S underwear I own would work ;-)

[venta.livejournal.com]

I don't think any of the non-M&S underwear I own would work ;-)

Are you saying anything more exciting than M&S couldn't remind anyone of me ;p

[leathellin.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't dream of saying such a thing :-)

Also I am either very lazy about buying underwear or very not lazy and the not lazy tends to be pricey which as someone else says might not be ideal for a hen night throwaway gift thingy.

[davefish.livejournal.com]

Miffy pants.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Not sure a sensible grown-up thirty-something accountant would appreciate Miffy pants :)

Also, I suspected you were going to say that.

[keris.livejournal.com]

Damn, I was going to say that! :)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Funnily enough, it was what ChrisC said as well :)

[ulfilias.livejournal.com]

It is looking like an LJ consesus !

About the only other thing i can think of is some gaffa tape pants based on a whitby costume IIRC.

Folk pants would be right out =;-)

[ar-gemlad.livejournal.com]

Hmm... a Google search for 'combat underpants' comes up with these, not so useful, gems:
Combat underpants
Captian Underpants

And a search for 'combat boxer shorts' gave this, possibly useful, result:
Ladies camo boxers (maybe a bit pricey for a joke present?)

(Now with proper html - Doh!)

[ar-gemlad.livejournal.com]

Damn! I can't spell Captain either!

[venta.livejournal.com]

But Captian is such a nice-sounding word :)

The camo boxers are a thought, if I can find a real shop to sell me such a thing (I feel like it's a bit short notice to go ordering things off t'interweb).

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

Girl boxers, of course.

[dmh.livejournal.com]

Frankly I don't dare give an answer!

[venta.livejournal.com]

What a wise man :)

On a completely unrelated note: I don't suppose you'd be interested in a ticket to see Einsturzende Neubauten on 22nd May in Kentish Town ? I have a spare...

[dmh.livejournal.com]

Actually I already have a ticket, but thanks. Sounds like you're the only person I know who's going!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Well, if you find any friends who'd like to come along...

[dmh.livejournal.com]

I will ask the Internets!

[ulfilias.livejournal.com]

Hmmm...do i want to go to this....I would me two gigs in a week as well !

[dmh.livejournal.com]

I'm sure you'd find it quite wunderbar.

[ulfilias.livejournal.com]

They are a Tenpole Tudor covers band....Top !

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

You forget me...

venta: Don't mind me. I was just pointed here by dmh but as I don't even know you (other than seeing your name here and there on my f-f-list) I have no recommendation.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Recommend away... nice to meet you. I apologise that today's LJ entry makes me look somewhat underwear-obsessed.

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

Likewise!
As the pants are unlikely to survive the night, anyway, I'd recommend something cheap and funny so the above mentioned Miffy pants might be a good idea. ;o)

[venta.livejournal.com]

As the pants are unlikely to survive the night, anyway

Er.... just what do you know about this proposed evening out that I don't!?

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

*laughs* You know, people get drunk, things get lost or forgotten, that sort of thing.

[dmh.livejournal.com]

Are you hear because of the underwear, or here because of Neubauten? Or a bit of both? ;o)

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

Underwear intrigues me. :o)

[dmh.livejournal.com]

Is the whole concept that alien to you? :o.

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

Well, you've seen me at Infest. ;oP

Seriously, no, I just like interesting underwear.

[davefish.livejournal.com]

Einsturzende Neupants?

[secondhand-rick.livejournal.com]

So, o LJ, what sort of pants might remind you of me ?

Erm, ones with your name sewn in?

Either that or pants that play boppy music on a Friday afternoon.

[ajntornj.livejournal.com]

A thong, coz you're alwayth coming up with lyricth to thongs that I haven't heard in yearth

-sorry, I'll get me coat...

[ewx.livejournal.com]

I haven't the faintest idea, but there should be a “what pants are you ” online quiz.

[venta.livejournal.com]

I had thought that, but was scared to google in case I was proved correct.

[hjalfi.livejournal.com]

Was university friend's locale set to English (British) or English (International)? Because it does make a difference.

I mention this merely because lesser mortals might not be able to cope with the level of embarrassment due to showing up with the wrong pants.

[venta.livejournal.com]

A question worth asking, but all involved are firmly UK-based. We are definitely talking underwear.

[hjalfi.livejournal.com]

And they're not a superhero or anything? That is, it's the kind of underwear that's worn on the inside?

(It's best to be sure, it's best to be sure...)

[ebee.livejournal.com]

LOL. So many answers- I'd get some of many sides...

[venta.livejournal.com]

Because nothing flatters a bride-to-be like the suggestion she has a polyhedral arse :)

[cuthbertcross.livejournal.com]

couldn't you buy a pair of black school knickers and sew on a few little bells/sticks (whatever accoutrements you use when rapping? Sorry, horribly ignorant!)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Swords, dammit!

Also, see reply to Lathany below...

[lathany.livejournal.com]

You could make an advent calendar out of a pair?

[venta.livejournal.com]

Actually, it dawns on me that this is one of the problems... the person who must identify me from the pants is someone I've not spent significant amounts of time with since she graduated in 1997.

Ten years ago I wasn't known for making advent calendars, or belonging to a rapper team, or posting tunes on Friday afternoons. I did goth up occasionally, and I dressed up for roleplaying things, but she probably never saw me at it.

In fact, I'm struggling to think what distinguishing features I had!