I'm lost in the supermarket

[venta]

I have just put an entire trolleysworth of shopping through a self-service checkout in Tesco, without once putting that which was unexpected in the bagging area. I was not beeped at, remonstrated with, warned or menaced by the machine. It did not summon members of staff at arbitrary moments. I even persuaded it to let me purchase the vacuum pack of smoked mackerel whose barcode didn't scan.

I am made of 24-carat, armour-plated righteous WIN.

Comments

[ebee.livejournal.com]

Tell us the ways of this mystic art of mighty beater of the whiney programmed voice for we seek to be as wonderous as you!

[venta.livejournal.com]

I reckon it's kind of the reverse of the list I wrote for ewx below.

1. Put own bags in bagging area before starting.
2. Pack carefully as you go, do not attempt to rearrange, BUT
3. Be quick! Once you've scanned an item you only have so long to get it in the bag.

I suspect most of the mistakes are caused by people getting flustered after an initial reprimand from the Voice. Last night it all seemed to go well and was actually... easy.

[valkyriekaren.livejournal.com]

I would add, "Don't wear a pinstriped jacket". Learned that one *fast*.

[satyrica.livejournal.com]

I'm in awe that you managed this whilst using your own bags!!

[(Anonymous)]

Own bags? You mentioned having been abducted and replaced by an alien. The evidence was being unable to answer a secret question, and more recently actually getting up. Does this latest feat suggest you are in fact an alien marsupial? I'm confused now.

Surely own bags feat

[a-llusive.livejournal.com]

is only possible if own bags are empty on starting - trying to add a few (or lots) of groceries to a bag with anything in it already (e.g. bike pannier) is impossible.