venta

I have just put an entire trolleysworth of shopping through a self-service checkout in Tesco, without once putting that which was unexpected in the bagging area. I was not beeped at, remonstrated with, warned or menaced by the machine. It did not summon members of staff at arbitrary moments. I even persuaded it to let me purchase the vacuum pack of smoked mackerel whose barcode didn't scan.

I am made of 24-carat, armour-plated righteous WIN.