You can take drugs if you want but I'm taking a rain... check me out

[venta]

When flying out to Germany (pre-kneesplosion), ChrisC and I checked ourselves in using one of the automatic touch-screen check-in machines rather than dealing with a human. You scan your passport, and push buttons to indicate how many bags you have.

At this point, a member of airport staff looked at us, and obviously saw two travellers staring in confusion at a screen. He came over to ask if we needed assistance.

No, thanks, we were doing fine.

But we continued to stare at the machine.

So he helpfully came closer and tried to press the button that was clearly eluding us.

I batted his hand away. The machine was showing a huge wall of text, with a "confirm" button at the bottom. We were not staring in confusion, we were reading the bloody text. That we were about to agree to. An act which airport staff regard as ridiculous and unprecedented behaviour. He apologised, now wary of these obvious weirdos who were reading the funny squiggles before clicking the large and commodious yellow button.

The next screen was busy with pictures and text, explaining all the things you mustn't put in your luggage. If you actually stopped to read all those, even the machine gave up and started warning that it was about to time out.

So there we are: neither Lufthansa's staff, nor their machines, really think you need to understand the terms you're agreeing to. Next time I think I will pack live ammunition in my suitcase.

Comments

[topum.livejournal.com]

I realised that I never read what I am agreeing to. Either on online or offline.

[venta.livejournal.com]

I always set off with good intentions, but I often end up skimming past large chunks. One of these days I'll miss something important and someone else will own my kidneys :(

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

Ah, the joy of the T&Cs ...

[venta.livejournal.com]

And they are such a joy - how could anyone want to skip them?

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

Wait, what's this bit here about the soul and blood of my firstborn?

[venta.livejournal.com]

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/technology/shanerichmond/100004946/gamestation-collects-customers-souls-in-april-fools-gag/

:)

[d-floorlandmine.livejournal.com]

Complete with typo ... [grin]

[lathany.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. And :-)

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

"...and tries to remember what to do next. There's a wave of frustration across her face, searching for the key she should press. Oh, I'd try to help you if I only knew how but these things they are a mystery to me too."

[venta.livejournal.com]

One kudo to you :)

[ebee.livejournal.com]

Yeh don't do that pet. It'd be messy. And 'im up there (better descriptor than 'im outside) gets well mardy about people not reading the rules. Especially about taking wrapped presents. Even from family members. Even if they are ex-crew.

Well done for reading them. You win an orange smile.

[venta.livejournal.com]

You can't take wrapped presents? Wow. I never managed to notice that. I mean, I rarely do because they usually get bashed in, and will look much nicer if you wrap them up after you've arrived.

I was just reading the conditions to try and work out whether the huge amount of hummus in my hold luggage was legal. (Apparently British people living in Germany - or at least these ones - miss Waitrose hummus!)

[ebee.livejournal.com]

You can't take presents that you don't know what they are. Ie 'has anyone asked you to carry anything for you?' Coz you'd be liable if it was drugs etc. or a breach of the illegal items of carriage. Hence if asking a family member to take a present its got to be unwrapped to confirm contents is legit. If you don't trust your family or are hardcore trained in aviation security.

My sister had houmuss confiscated once. She gets a bit middle class ranty if you mention it.

[qatsi.livejournal.com]

On return from our last holiday, Mrs Q and I found ourselves directed to automated barriers for UK passport control. Ahead of us were an elderly couple who were having difficulty. It turns out the biometrics don't work if you swap passports with your other half. It didn't seem appropriate to enquire why they hadn't checked they each had the right passport before they began. (I supose if you are used to doing things by hand, you hand over two passports to the official, and you ae both waved through ... but ...)

[zotz]

Possibly for slightly perverse reasons, this reminds me of an interview with Bruno Ganz that I watched on YouTube. He was talking about acting, and in particular about Downfall and his newfound fame as Hitler. So there was the question of what he thought of all the comedic resubtitlings, and people greeting him as Hitler on the street, and even his wife fondly addressing him as Adolf when she thinks he's being unreasonable.

Afterwards it occurred to me that I speak no German: everything I took as his opinion on Downfall and Hitler and his family, I assumed was true from reading the subtitles.

[exspelunca.livejournal.com]

One boss I once had was approached, some years ago, by someone else on his flight, a total stranger, who asked if he'd add a small suitcase to his meagre luggage as hers was overweight. He did. Where were they flying? Tel Aviv, at a time of hijacks and bombs on planes.

[venta.livejournal.com]

That boss was a blessed idiot, though :)

[exspelunca.livejournal.com]

True, and a lucky idiot. He lost the family passports in both Israel and Egypt AND got them back both times.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Hence "blessed"! Someone was clearly looking out for him :)