I know your every move, so won't you just let me be

[venta]

While passing briefly through Hounslow station last week I encountered some poorly-rendered but delightfully weird graffiti.






For those of you without the patience/imagination/eyesight to puzzle over them, the first one reads "HOW MANY NON DESCRIPTS IN YOUR HELL?"

The next reads "HOW CAN THE POPE DO ANYTHING HE HASN'T GOT A ROD CALLED ARTEMIS?"

I find that a little disappointing. The question about non-descripts in Hell seemed strangely arresting, and now we've clearly veered off into faintly deranged territory.

Sadly, the third photo is even less legible, and I couldn't fit the whole of the sentence into one picture. My phone has old-fashioned zoom, ie one has to walk backwards. I was mildly perturbed that I was about to go backwards off the edge of the platform.

However, from Kew Bridge to well past Waterloo it read "SORCERY CAN'T EXIST ACCORDING TO THE LYING PAEDOPHILE CALLED PRINCE PHILLIP WHY THEN DID HE MARRY THE WITCH CALLED FIGURATIVELY ARTEMIS?"

Why indeed.

Comments

[phlebas.livejournal.com]

Well, if Prince Philip is married to Artemis, Artemis must be Her Majesty. Who is the head of the Anglican church and thus not subject to the Pope, so he cannot exercise control through her (use her as 'a rod').
I'm not certain how that ties in with the nondescripts or the sorcery, though.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Err, ok. I'm not used to people addressing HM as "Brenda". Maybe you hang out in more elevated social circles than I do :)

[phlebas.livejournal.com]

Oh, sorry. I'm not sure about social circles - it's a Private Eye-ism.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Probably more of an intellectual circle, then :) I've never been a Private Eye reader. Historically I wasn't politically-informed enough to get the jokes - I might be these days, but just never see it.

Your theory is clearly in its early stages (missing the sorcery, paedophilia and hell), but it seems to be shaping up nicely. I'll probably next be in Hounslow in a week or two, I'll see if we've been updated with any further detail!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Report from Hounslow station last night: the map has been replaced with a shiny, clean one which expresses no weird opinions.