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ventaI've just been reading an article about the threat posed to companies by sysadmins, and the trouble they can cause when they leave. In it, the writer draws the analogy to his own son who, on moving out of the family house, will be required to leave his doorkeys behind: "Just because he lived here does not mean he's entitled to just walk in when it suits him."
Which surprised me. I still have a key to my parents' house, despite having not significantly lived there in a decade. I feel it would be impolite just to walk in unannounced (not to mention impractical - our respective abodes are a couple of hundred miles apart), but in theory I could. When I visit, I let myself in rather than ringing the bell. Occasionally I stay there when my parents are away, though I do ask in advance.
Observation of a limited number of friends in the environs of their parents' houses has suggested that they have broadly similar arrangements.
So, o LJ, tell me what is normal, usual behaviour.
I guess it depends to some extent on the relationship you have with your parents and, possibly, whether or not they've moved since you last lived with them. I have never formally 'moved out' of my parents' house - my bedroom is still notionally my bedroom, and has quite a lot of my stuff in it; I suspect this will change if/when I ever manage to purchase my own residence. How many people do officially 'move out' as opposed to slowly drifting into new routines, leaving their parents' house festooned with junk to be tolerated, delivered in a crate or quietly thrown away. How many people have been relieved of their keys ? Have people been presented with keys to a new parental abode in which they've never lived ?
Which surprised me. I still have a key to my parents' house, despite having not significantly lived there in a decade. I feel it would be impolite just to walk in unannounced (not to mention impractical - our respective abodes are a couple of hundred miles apart), but in theory I could. When I visit, I let myself in rather than ringing the bell. Occasionally I stay there when my parents are away, though I do ask in advance.
Observation of a limited number of friends in the environs of their parents' houses has suggested that they have broadly similar arrangements.
So, o LJ, tell me what is normal, usual behaviour.
I guess it depends to some extent on the relationship you have with your parents and, possibly, whether or not they've moved since you last lived with them. I have never formally 'moved out' of my parents' house - my bedroom is still notionally my bedroom, and has quite a lot of my stuff in it; I suspect this will change if/when I ever manage to purchase my own residence. How many people do officially 'move out' as opposed to slowly drifting into new routines, leaving their parents' house festooned with junk to be tolerated, delivered in a crate or quietly thrown away. How many people have been relieved of their keys ? Have people been presented with keys to a new parental abode in which they've never lived ?
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Date: 2008-07-31 11:47 am (UTC)That said, we (much like you, given your folks given a dozen miles down the road from mine) live hundreds of miles apart, so there's absolutely no use in having spare keys for key-holder purposes - and half the time when I go up to visit them I travel by train so they come and meet me anyway, meaning there's no chance of me arriving to an empty house.
OTOH, Dave has keys to his folks' house, who are equally far away - but then, we often end up spending weekends with them even further away in their caravan rather than the house, so we end up stopping off at the house mid-route instead of a service-station stop, or to break the journey overnight if the roads have been a pig.