You light up another cigarette and I pour the wine

[venta]

If I recall correctly, in one of the later Hitchhiker books Wonko The Sane built an asylum for the world after he discovered someone thought it necessary to print instructions on toothpicks.

I had a similar moment in Saisnbury's on Monday. You can now buy "ready to drink" wine. That is, a cardboard pack which contains two wine-filled plastic wine glasses, each sealed with a film lid.

Now, OK, if you're going on a picnic and want less than a bottle of wine and don't want to carry glasses, I can just about see that there might be a use. But really... quite apart from any environmental considerations of throwing away two plastic glasses, some film, and some cardboard just for two moderately-sized glasses of wine, I just can't help thinking that somehow the world has gone mad.

Anyone else up for living Outside The Asylum with me ?

Comments

[kissifa.livejournal.com]

I would have paid to hear the marketing guy/gal successfully sell that idea - whoever they are, they are clearly wizards who can warp the minds of people into believing whatever they say is really a very good idea.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Possibly another genius idea from the people who brought you ready-grated cheese and pre-cooked mashed potato.

[wechsler.livejournal.com]

"Pre-eaten" can't be far off.

[valkyriekaren.livejournal.com]

I've certainly had supermarket food the texture of which would suggest it had been 'pre-chewed'.

[bateleur.livejournal.com]

It already exists! My daughter lived off pre-digested milk for months back when she was too ill for the regular sort. Her doctor dared me to try some, adding that in his opinion it's the most revolting thing he's ever tasted!

(She's fine now, so presumably the stuff was some good...)

[venta.livejournal.com]

So, did you try some ?

[bateleur.livejournal.com]

So, did you try some ?

No!

[onebyone.livejournal.com]

It already exists!

Indeed: I think earth-folk call it "honey".

[venta.livejournal.com]

Or, in some particularly icky-sounding circumstances, coffee.

[beckyl.livejournal.com]

Stephen Fry, QI, Civets?

[floralaetifica.livejournal.com]

This is precisely why I find the idea of honey revolting. Mmm, bee vomit.

[thegreenman.livejournal.com]

How about cheese?

Milk thats been turned by bacteria then allowed to fester for a few months while more bacteria give it some flavour...

Wine and Beer are the product of Yeast based anaerobic digestion of the surgar content.

Bread and many baked goods. Ditto.

[floralaetifica.livejournal.com]

Yeast doesn't bother me at all - that's just plant-like, really.

The cheese thing - yes, cheese is seriously weird, but still less creepy than food that's been eaten by insects. I can't *see* bacteria, you know. They don't have giant mandibles.

[rabbit1080.livejournal.com]

I buy ready-grated cheese, and keep it in the freezer so it doesn't go mouldy. For use on top of things wot get baked with crunchy cheese on top.
However, I draw the line at "instant" mashed-potato. I'd rather eat mashed-potato that tastes like potato :)

Btw, my last emergency-picnic purchase was a cheese-knife made of olive wood. In Tasmania. The blue-vein goats cheese was delicious.