Not a sound from the pavement

[venta]

This week's stack of library books included Arthur & George. On the train in to work this morning, the first chapter introduced me to both the gentlemen.

One of the things which came up in George's description is that he doesn't have a particular memory that he regards as "his first memory", and had never considered that he ought, or that it was normal, to have such a thing.

I have never been aware of having an earliest memory. I have very, very vague memories of visiting my Nana, who died when I was 3. They are so vague that I wouldn't even really call them memories, more impressions - and even then, I can't be totally sure that they haven't been formed from me being told about her when I was older.

I do wonder that one of my difficulties in pin-pointing an earliest memory is lack of reference points. People often say that they remember being in such-and-such a house, and they know that the family moved from that house when they were two. Or they remember a holiday their parents took them on at a certain age.

We didn't move house when I was a child, and our family holidays were (and still are!) always in the same place. Obviously there were trips to particular places that would come with a date attached, but whenever the mother says "do you remember..." the answer is usually "no", unless it happened much later in life.

I have the fixed points of the deaths of my Nana, and also of my Grandad (when I was 6). I have reasonably clear memories of Grandad, so I certainly have memories from before the age of 6 1/2. Most other things which can be pinned to a time - playgroup, starting school etc belong in the vague-impression category. Perhaps when people talk about their earliest memories, they also are relating only a vague sense of an event rather than what I might now call a memory of something.

Do you have an earliest memory? If so, how old were you when it was formed? How can you be sure it's the earliest?

Comments

[venta.livejournal.com]

There was a time, not long after I started working, when I was cramming too much into my life and not sleeping enough. I felt like I was coping at the time, but it seems like the thing that went out of the window was proper memory-formation.

It's quite disturbing to hear a group of people reminiscing happily about things that happened and to think "well, I *know* I was there..."

[lanfykins.livejournal.com]

Ooh, interesting. Because I don't think I've had enough sleep for longer than a week at a time since primary school. Which may explain something about my broken memories.

[venta.livejournal.com]

I've no idea how solid the science behind this is. But anecdotally it makes a big difference to me (over a long period of time, rather than, say, a couple of late nights and I lose a day).

I've always imagined deep sleep as a time when memories are sorted, catalogued and filed. And, if that doesn't happen, they just get mislaid down the backs of shelves and under sofas.

[lanfykins.livejournal.com]

I've a vague recollection that there's some evidence for that idea.

Which makes it suck even more to be a chronic night owl in today's society. Not that I'm bitter about losing the best years of my life to constant tiredness or anything :)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Surely better than being a night owl in a pre-electricity society ;)

[lanfykins.livejournal.com]

There is that :) Whose stupid idea was this anyway...

[bopeepsheep.livejournal.com]

The memories I've lost are partly lack of sleep, partly *cough* substances *cough*, and partly a result of brain injuries. I'm not good at making new memories now, either, through a combination of sleep issues and medication. The memories I do have from the last ~15 years, however, are very very clear - almost 'lucid dreaming' in quality.