venta | Two in the morning there's a drink in my hand

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Two in the morning there's a drink in my hand

Probably the most entertaining kedgeree recipe you will ever read

I will be trying it out just as soon as I have a spare morning. It sounds way better than my recipe.

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If I'm honest, I am a bit 'Rick Stein' about my kedgeree, but I'd be prepared to give his version a go.

I just need to wait for wife and baby to absent themselves for a night and morning so I can get away with barefoot, martini-fuelled kedgering.

I certainly don't make the best kedgeree in the world, so would also be willing to give your slightly-Rick-Stein kedgeree a go if you're happy/have time to share the recipe.

A while ago I had kedgeree for breakfast in a posh hotel and it was rather saucy[*] which was fabulous and not at all what I'm used to. Attempts to recreate that at home were largely disastrous.

[*] quiet at the back, there

Unless you're actually very Rick Stein about it, in which case I should check whether the cookbook or two of his I have have the recipe in. I've a feeling I do have a recipe of his, but it involves Arbroath smokies which put me off a bit.

Ooh, no, I'm not literally Rick Stein about it. I was taking that simply to mean a bit precious and foodie.

I'm afraid I don't have a recipe to hand, though I might try and figure one out; though that would be prone to memory errors. Ideally I will just make detailed notes next time I cook it, though that still relies on me being able to send mother and baby away¹. I'll tell them it's your idea she move out.

[1] - Not because mine necessarily involves morning martinis, but more because the Very Nice Wife^tm disagrees with the smell of kedgeree in the morning. Oddly enough, she doesn't think it smells like victory!

though I might try and figure one out

The mother did this for years with bread. She basically had two styles of making bread:

1) Throw everything in paying very little attention. Result: great bread.
2) Make careful notes and weigh things and write down the method. Result: mildly rubbish bread.

Accordingly, I still don't have her bread recipe :)

Please do not tell the Very Nice Wife^tm that I said she should move out. I feel this would be damaging to the Very Nice Family^tm.

I used to love kedgeree… sadly don't suppose there will ever really be a veggie equiv.

And I used to love Luke Haines too – good to see he's still getting up to stuff! That blog looks a wee bit sporadic…

Apparently (http://zotz.livejournal.com/383057.html) Mr Haines' latest literary efforts are worth reading, though I haven't tested them personally yet.

Mm, I should really get to reading that.

Hmm. I wonder if a veggie equivalent could be made with smoked halloumi...

It would be very nice, I'm sure. But it wouldn't be equivalent. Not in my mind, anyway… There's nothing quite like smoked fish. Most of all I used to like smoked mackerel, preferably with granary toast.

Yup, I guarantee they will never make a veggie equivalent of that!

Too rubbery, surely. Smoked tofu would be too tofu-ey. Hrrm. There must be something you can smoke

Can you poach lentils in milk? I've never tried, so I don't know.

If you can, then maybe you could saute some onion and really smokey smoked garlic with your spices. Add the lentils and then milk to poach. Once cooked, drain. Use (some of) the liquid (mixed with stock/water) to cook your rice. Once the rice is cooked, then stir in the onion/garlic/lentil/spice mixture and hard boiled eggs and a decent fistful of chopped fresh parsley. Maybe a hit of lemon juice.

Obviously you're still going to be absent the flakey texture, and the essentially fishy flavour, but other than that I think it might work.

Assuming you can poach lentils in milk, that is.

Still not sure about the poaching in milk (I like my kedgeree to have a slightly creamy texture), but a quick google for 'vegetarian kedgeree' does seem to indicate lentils are the way to go.

None of them seem to be really doing very much about the smokiness though, and this one features vegetarian black pudding, which I don't understand. Is there a less vegetarian thing than black pudding?

Arborio rice? Puy lentils? Vegetable stock? That recipe is sheer stark madness.

I'm intrigued by the notion of veggie black pudding though, I wonder what the heck is in it (and why).

I wonder what the heck is in it

Lose 2D6 SAN for your musings!

Definitely!

A really good, firm smoked tofu might do the trick. The Viana one doesn't really taste of tofu, just of smoky saltiness.

It's the fishiness which is the best thing about kedgeree afaics, and sadly that seems a lot more difficult to simulate -- even in a very generalized way -- than meatiness does. I expect there's some good biochemical reason for that…

I love that. That is how recipes should be written. If more recipes captured the barely in control, edge of chaos experience that is a man in the kitchen more men would spend more time in the kitchen.

Less of this step 1, step 2 stuff, and much more 'oh god, panic!'. That's what we need.

more men would spend more time in the kitchen

Away with you and your gender stereotypes!

Although I agree about the writing style. Also recommended: Warren Ellis' "Experiments in Food".

Entertainingly sweary!

Not sure about the whole 'cooking the rice fresh' thing. For anything involving fried rice (Chinese fried rice, kedgeree) I always use leftover rice from the night before, as it fries up better and is less wet.

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Two in the morning there's a drink in my hand

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Dirt, dirt, dirty Martini

One kudo to you, sir!

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