Who pruned all the fruit trees to which Genesis refers?

[venta]

I am not a natural gardener. I'm well-intentioned, and I talk to my plants, but I'm just fundamentally not very good at it.

I now live in a flat with a very green-looking garden out the back. This is looked after by proper grown-ups who come and prune and mow and do all those sorts of things. Such gardens are, indeed, made by saying "oh, how beautiful" and sitting in the shade.

However, I'm not supposed to go out and plant carrots in the flower beds, so instead I have turned my attention to the windowboxes and tubs on the balcony, left behind by the previous occupant, and formerly occupied by some rather sorry-looking geranium-corpses. The geraniums were alive when we moved in, but didn't survive the cold winter.

So, last Saturday I instituted a minor holocaust, sweeping the miscellaneous crud from the corners of the balcony. It's basically a brick box, and was about 15% full of dead leaves. And dead ladybirds, dead caterpillars, dead spiders, a dead mop, a whole colony of dead dishcloths... everything seemed to have crawled in there and died. There were also live spiders, running away from me on six legs so they could wave the spare two in panic.

Anyway, after a jaunt to B&Q I opened my brand new bag of potting compound, and put into a tub my nice new lavender bush. A lavender bush in a pot is my idea of the height of sophistication[*]. I also potted up a rather sick-looking B&Q clematis, and a pretty, blue-flowered plant with a hugely unmemorable name. In so far as I can tell, all have survived the experiment.

However, the chief excitement was the two window boxes on the balcony edge. In one I planted salad leaf seeds, and in the other beetroot and radish seeds. Actually, the beetroot "seeds" were almost chunky enough to make me break out the word corm. However I fear that it's (a) not technically correct and (b) will give you a disproportionate impression of my gardening knowledge.

One finished, I promptly reverted to being a three year old, and have been dashing out ridiculously frequently to see if anything's germinated yet. Yesterday was a triumphal victory for West Window Box[**] which showed the faintest of hints that wiggly green things might be appearing. Today, WWB is raring into the lead with little shoots of salad leaves all over the place.

Last night, at dance practice, everyone assured me that radishes are famously fast germinators. I sternly informed East Window Box of this this morning, and it has now got its act together and produced the merest vestige of a green shoot. The official rapidity of beetroot is as yet unknown.

I also finally got round to planting the kids' herb-growing kits I bought in the January sales. Putting a coir tablet into warm water is much more fun than you might think. The finished pots are sitting on the kitchen window sill, where I hope their close proximity to each other will encourage competition. Thus far I can report that Tina Thyme and Sarah Sage have managed small shoots, but Clint Mint and Pat Parsley are lagging far behind. The names aren't mine, by the way, they came pre-labelled; disappointingly there was no Basil Basil.

Which is not to say I don't name my plants. Percy the peace lily, a house-warming gift, has diligently produced a new crop of flowers for us. Sadly, on my way to reboot the router this morning, I saw his leaves sagging forlornly over the edge of his pot - in all this excitement of new plants, it seems I'd quite forgotten to water him. I am now testing cuthbertcross's claim that peace lilies are very forgiving and that even at the almost-dead stage they can be resurrected with a pint of water. He still looks very miserable and droopy, I feel terribly guilty.

Expect real-time updates on the growth of seedlings to follow until the novelty wears off :)

[*] This isn't strictly true. My idea of the height of sophistication is a lemon tree in a pot, but on a north-facing balcony I feel that would be a little over-optimistic.
[**] For those desperately curious about the layout, both boxes are on the north-facing balcony edge. By WWB I merely mean "the one on the left".

Comments

[fractalgeek.livejournal.com]

Our window boxes are looking fabulous this year, and the secret is mostly that we have a friendly neighbour watering them EVERY DAY.

[marjory.livejournal.com]

Ah, now! My one piece of horticultural wisdom is that geraniums can and will survive the winter if dragged indoors.

You have caught the gardening bug! Hooray!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Ah. I didn't really think about it, to be honest, until is was too late.

Does your stock of wisdom have any further details to help those who have inherited a large number of rather muddy geranium pots, and a very pale grey carpet indoors?

[marjory.livejournal.com]

1. Clean the geranium pots.
2. Buy cheapo place mats to sit them on.
3. Pray.

My stock of wisdom does not go much further, I am afraid! At various points, I have been forced to refer to myself as the Death of Plants, but dr_mitch makes me weed, water and mulch anyway.

[fractalgeek.livejournal.com]

Garden centers will often sell folding work thingies - eg a mat with sides that clip together into a low boxy/tray shape, intended for things like potting up.

Garage/car places will sell you low drip trays (to catch engine oil in garages) that make great plant bases for a large grouping. Cat litter trays are also good.

[venta.livejournal.com]

So long as they'll also sell me the floorspace to put such things in, any of those would be a winner :)

[fractalgeek.livejournal.com]

Hence the "folding" bit. Long term raising is another matter but collapsible seed tray stands work quite well in restricted areas, like a small balcony or patio.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Aha - since the problem to be solved was "where to put plants over the winter", I was more worried about where to put folding trays while they were in action than I was about where to store them while unused!

[fractalgeek.livejournal.com]

Most die back to a bulb/corm, others stay a plant. Somewhere dry, dark and cool.

[venta.livejournal.com]

I don't think you've grasped the problem :)

It's not a matter of understanding the requirements, so much as not having the physical space in the flat to give pots of geramniums houseroom over the winter.

[fractalgeek.livejournal.com]

The ones that die back to Corms don't need pots, just a small box at the back of a cupboard. Pick your varieties appropriately when you first buy!

[snow-leopard.livejournal.com]

We are already eating home grown lettuce (lots of), strawberries, rhubarb, raspberries and spinach. My hanging basket tomatoes are looking good as are the potatoes and sweetcorn!
We do, however have a 'proper' garden which gives us a bit more growing space!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Wow, I'm impressed! Also faintly jealous :)

[snow-leopard.livejournal.com]

We attempt it every year, but most years we lose the battle with the slugs and snails. The hot weather seems to have meant we have done better this time!

[venta.livejournal.com]

Yes, last time I tried tomatoes in the Oxford house, the slugs were the main winners! A friend recommended copper tape as being extremely good against slugs - apparently they get something equivalent to a mild electric shock off it, and don't like crossing it.

(I have no idea of the science behind that, maybe rubbish! She said it was very successful at deterring slugs in her garden though.)

[snow-leopard.livejournal.com]

Well, yes we already figured this, hence the sweetcorn and lettuce are gown in pots with cotter tape rings around them and the tomatoes are grown in hanging baskets which also keeps them out of the slugs way.

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

The thing I've found with tomatoes is to let them get MASSIVE on the windowsill and then plant them out with a head start. The slugs have a go but usually don't manage to finish them off. Also, the leaves and stems are hairier the older they get, which makes the slugs give up.

[undyingking.livejournal.com]

Our own peace lily certainly bears out the cuthbertcross theory. I have even heard that a drought every now and then encourages it to flower.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Percy is look happy again, and his leaves are once more pointing at the sky. Hurray for plants with a bit of tolerance of ineptitude on the part of their carers.

[onebyone.livejournal.com]

secretrebel's latest exciting innovation is an olive tree in a pot.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Blimey. Get you and your lifestyle ;)