venta

Just a quick note for those of you who like to keep up with the cut-throat world of competitive sword-dancing: this weekend sees DERT, the national rapper competition, in Newcastle.

Dance teams are marked on various technical matters, and on the elusive "buzz factor" - the rather unquantifiable quantity of being exciting. A recent reading of this year's rules suggests that any team receiving a standing ovation will automatically score full marks for buzz. So if anyone happens to be flapping around Byker with nothing to do tomorrow, feel free to come and stand-up while cheering wildly shortly after we've danced (or, if you're influenced by merit, after someone else has danced).

Careful studying of the world's most confusing timetable (Mabel Gubbins are on tour 7, cycle 2, rotating anti-clockwise[*]), our approximate plan with spuriously accurate timing is:

The Ship (11:37 - 12:13)
Egypt Cottage (13:00 - 13:36)
Eye of the Tyne[**] (14:57 - 15:33)
The Tanners (16:21 - 16:57)
Cumberland Arms (17:44 - 18:20)

There is an evening showcase of all teams in the Artworks gallery, though I believe there's a £5 charge for that.

Oh, and I'm not joking about the cut-throat. Competitive rapper is serious stuff.

[*] I have no idea.
[**] Yes thanks, I am going to be failing to make this scan to the tune of Eye of the Tiger. All day.