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Friday ? Time for a silly quiz. This poses as a series of cryptic questions, but is really a thinly disguised lyrics quiz. I don't need artists or songnames, just answer the questions.

1. She dances on the beach a lot. Just like, er, a river. What's her name ?

2. What's the spiderman having for dinner tonight ?

3. What the hell am I doing here, I don't belong here. What am I ?

4. It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care. Why can't I go out tonight ?

5. I'm moving to the country, what will I eat a lot of ?

6. I'd like to change the colour of my hair, but I don't want to use one of those dyes you buy in shops. I'd like my hair to be real orange. What should I use ? (Bonus points on this one if you spell the answer correctly, that is to say the way I want it spelled).

7. I've put a latch on the door. What am I doing that I don't want Momma to know about ?

8. That girl's got no clothes on! She's running around trying to borrow a quid. What does she want to spend it on ?

9. My brother met some guy in the Peoples' Park. He was eating mushrooms. Who was he ?

10. What do I choose to do to achieve consciousness expansion ?

11. The devil's going to drag you under! By your lapels! Why is sitting down an advised course of action ?

12. If you trade your heroes, and get ghosts in exchange, what might you swap for hot ashes ?

13. What question does the whole world, once again, have to answer right now ?

14. I could eat my dinner at a fancy restaurant, but I wouldn't enjoy it. Why not ?

15. How many prostitutes are there in that room next door ?

16. What were you doing when I first met you ? I knew that there could only be one outcome: you and me against the world.

17. We'll all take turns, even me. Where has that monkey gone ?

18. Which underground station do millions of people swarm around, like flies ?

19. What did Ziggy play ?

20. What is it called when people from the city have lunch in the park ?

For extra credit, predict what's going to be In The Box this afternoon by listing some of the things we stole!

I'm not sure how hard this is likely to be. Some of the songs are quite obscure, some aren't. I've tried to include some dead-easy ones, but these things never seem to come out how I expect.

I can't rule out that there might be some ambiguous questions: if the lyrics for your answer are online, and if I - in my my ultimate, arbitrary and easily-bought wisdom - rule that your answer is as good as mine, you can have your points.

Comments are screened, leave your answers below.

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