There's gonna be an accident

[venta]

I just misread one of my own posts. Specifically, I misread the "Music" line. And it amused me, and I think it could become a game.

It's simple - take a band name, add one letter to it. Make a new band name, and tell me the music they play.

So, the original one: Lots of young women who sing harmoniously as they slave away hammering out armour. Yes, it's...

Pretty Girls Make Greaves.

And look over there. The industrial, grinding noise of heavy agricultural machinery operated by benign, smiling little green ladies who wave their knitting at you as the push out another string of heavy bass.

It's... Alien Aunt Farm.

And who are those young gentleman in their crips white suits ? Their traditional rock'n'roll vibe makes them seem so cleancut, somehow.

Oh, they'll be the Dreftones.

(Barrel scraping there, I think.)

Now, of course, I'm trying to think of others, but I keep running into a few problems. A short band name, and it's not obvious what you're basing it on. Mash and Mouse are not readily identifiable as Ash and Muse. Use an obscure band name, and it's not obvious either. And, the worst pitfall of all - add one letter, and suddenly you've got not a bad pun, but a bad tribute band. Consider, if you will:

The Stoned Roses.

No, it's not a group of apple-cheeked English maidens playing on panpipes and sitars, it's clearly just a bunch of rocker-wannabes trotting out poor renditions of She Bangs The Drums.

Any offers ? Go on, even if you hate music this is just an excuse for bad puns. And however much they claim not to, everyone like a good bad pun. Readers are welcome to decry any new bands they consider to be mere cover outfits.

Comments

[zotz]

Mancunian existential malaise with a side-order of scatology - Joby Division.

Or is that not what you meant?

[zotz]

Newt Model Army, of course, are as noted for their dioramas of amphibians as for their music.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Ooh, splendid.

I mean, splendid pun. Not a splendid mental image.

[wimble.livejournal.com]

Is this a meme?

Clearly, calls for sheep in the garden!

(Baaa-der meinhof)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Sheep Won Drugs.

[venta.livejournal.com]

You're too damn good at this.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Stompy rock, with the guitarists pausing only to hurl custard pies across the stage.

The Food Fighters

I probably can't get any more mileage out of Dogs Die In Hot Carts, can I?

[nalsa.livejournal.com]

A religious self-harming drug-fuelled dance troupe, Pope will eat itself.

[mr-tom.livejournal.com]

Tart of Noise: Their experimental pie-based sounds are rich and creamy.

Blink 192: Their west-coast pop punk sings out the number you were looking for.

Dick Dalek: Virtuoso guitar playing combined with extra-terrestrial warblings.

Skate Bush: Warblings on wheels

[mr-tom.livejournal.com]

Yop La Tengo - Yoghurty indie pop.

[neilh.livejournal.com]

Pat the Drive-in - an ex-truck driver who ate one too many hamburgers and can't climb into his cab any more, sings bad country songs for a living instead
Badly Drawn Body - an amputee punk band
Breastie Boys - crossdressering poodlehaired rock band
Birohazard - geeky looking chemists, lots of pyro in stageshow

oh, yes, I like this game

[elethiomel.livejournal.com]

The Beagles

A 70s West-Coast Rock phenomenon who have recently reformed after rediscovering their collective love of small dogs.

[secondhand-rick.livejournal.com]

meminem - Jim Henson inspired rapper
The Chives - not my favourite new band, I mean, they're ok but do they really contribute anything?
Piggy Pop - going straight after years of drug abuse, he really piled on the pounds
Mettalicat - They play thrash, they wear catsuits!
Nine Inch Snails - They're huge and coming for your cabbage!
Nob Doubt - Gwen Stefani sings of penis envy
Placebot - automatic Brian never moves
FU2 - Bono and the boys respond to their critics

[venta.livejournal.com]

meminem - Jim Henson inspired rapper

I hate you.

green tea | nose > keyboard

[diffrentcolours]

Aphex Twine - experimental musician makes noises by sampling vibrations on string.

Echo & The Bunnymenu - one man's life in an all-you-can-eat game restaurant

4fat Fingers - punk rockers who need session musicians to play guitars for them

Happy Moondays - Madchester funk-influenced serial bottom-exposers

DearthBoy - Pounding tek-punk, but strangely lacking something

Mortiiis - Makes no sense, but sometimes two i's aren't enough.

[venta.livejournal.com]

4fat Fingers - punk rockers who need session musicians to play guitars for them

Damn you, I was just typing that one! (Though worrying that not that many people would know the 4ft Fingers anyway.)

Pushing it a bit...

[venta.livejournal.com]

Bubblegum punk pop, wearing nice green tweeds, from Helen Lovet.

[narenek.livejournal.com]

They Might Bed Giants - American band with a fetish for tall women, known for their song "She's actual size"
The Strokers - New York group who make music by encouraging cats to purr on stage
Guns and Rosens - West Coast Rock music provides the backing for an east end poet (if anyone else gets this one, let me know).

Guns and Rosens

[killalla]

I loved their cover of "If I Were A Rich Man" from Fiddler on the Roof...

[bateleur.livejournal.com]

Well someone has to do 'em:

Aerosith - The dark Jedi whose distinctive rock music defined a genre.
Gums and Roses - Those toothless 80-something rockers just keep on truckin'.
Motorherd - A dozen cyborg cows who only ever wrote one good tune.

[onebyone.livejournal.com]

I've just been authorised by venta to disqualify you for not reading the instructions.

[drdoug.livejournal.com]

Franz Ferdinando - Scottish rockers with an Abba covers obsession

The Krillers - Baleen whales play indie prog-punk

Mooby - Cow pop electronica

Fatboy Slime - Unpleasantly greasy DJ spins very danceable tunes

System Of A Drown - Depressing underwater bubbling

The Splice Girls - Old school overlay edits

Kleane - Proctor and Gamble-sponsored crooning

Maroon 5-0 - Hawaiian R&B rock fusion


Stretching the rules a bit we have:

The Prorogues - Indie music for the closing of Parliament

The Futons - The apotheosis of bedroom rock

Snow Petroleum - Bleak pop to power skiddooes

[rgl.livejournal.com]

System Of A Drown - Depressing underwater bubbling

My non-politically correct medic friends always refer to them as Syndrome of a Down. Doctors, eh?

[kauket.livejournal.com]

Red Hot Chili Preppers (small boys at posh schools say 'fuck' a lot)

Ohhh I'm gonna spend all afternoon playing this game.

[rgl.livejournal.com]

As am I. Unfortunately in the past I've always done this with song titles - in fact Phill (drummer from moonkat) and I used to play this a lot. The best was definitely "Left on my own in Devizes (I probably would)", for all you Pet Shop Boys fans. I responded with "These boots are made for Woking" (or the more obscure "Woking with thee"). J-P may have started off the town references with "Summertown (and the living is easy)". I think Phill also used to refer to Pitchshifter as Bitchfister, but that was just because she didn't like them.

OK, the first thing that comes to my addled mind is that variation on the Hansel and Gretel story: ...And you will know us by the trail of bread

[ex-lark-asc.livejournal.com]

Goldie Looking Chain - world's first well-spoken rap band

Maim - chillingly sick, yet strangely relaxing

Hair - doomed attempt to fuse retro chillout sounds with glam rock

Bevanescence - famous for writing passionately depressed songs about coal and the death of old labour.

[zotz]

Bevanescence

Fantastic.

[kauket.livejournal.com]

Hash - Indie-pop slows down and has the munchies

Supper Furrie Animals - Welsh music for dinner parties

Smashing Plumpkins - the miserable bass playing chick gets fat.

Terriervision (sorry)

Jest - 'Are you gonna be my girl...only kidding'

[grumblesmurf.livejournal.com]

All About Evel - Folk/rock interspersed with revving motorcycles.

Stratus Quo - Light, ethereal pop/rock, composed using only three chords.

Van? Morrison's. - Irish soul recorded in the back of supermarket delivery trucks.

Sued me - Brit indie pop band forced to change their name, ironically enough, because of an existing lounge singer's lawsuit.

Savaged Garden - Australian pop performed on hedgetrimmers and lawnmowers.

Deft Leppard - Big hair rock with agile drummer.

ABCD - Four chord eighties new wave melodic synth-based pop.

The Miss Zion - Goth band from Utah.

B Sting - Performs bland pop once, then dies after discarding his own abdomen.

The Skinks - Whimsical pop/rock group dressed as lizards.

Dead Can't Dance - or much else, really.

The Smithys - Morose droning accompanied by anvils and hammers.

[damerell.livejournal.com]

The Barenaked Lardies - the BNL really did do a shirtless Quicktime short called "Abs of Lard", so this works quite well.

3 to start with...

[metame.livejournal.com]

Famous pop combo - but what's with the drummer?

The Beatless

Stadium pleasing 14th Century chamber music

Dr and the Medicis

Rock, in unadulterated form

Lead Zeppelin

Re: 3 to start with...

[leathellin.livejournal.com]

You missed The Vervets - cute and furry but miserable all the time.

[venta.livejournal.com]

Cheesy punk from The Edamned.
Outdated punk from the Buzzcrocks.

I think in order to choose which of the many suggestions is best, I'll have to form an Interpoll.

[wehmuth.livejournal.com]

The Cured - Salty aspidistra haired melancholy

The Emission - Smelly rockers with pretensions of goth

Adam and the Rants - Angry 80's band, takes your money and your life

Hoth Chocolate - Unpleasant smelling tunes from the intestines of Tauntauns, but with smooth vocals

The Dread Kennedys - Political Rastafarians

Teenage Flan Club - Quiche influences are heavy in this popular beat combo

Fratboy Slim - Spoilt, but he can spin those disks

Funk Lovin' Criminals - Actually, they don't sound any different

The Spine Doctors - Anatomopop

Faith No Moore - They care a lot about comics

[secretrebel.livejournal.com]

Dead Can't Dance - ethereal gothic trance with arrhthymic sampled FX, most notably 'falling down the stairs' and 'foot caught in handbag'.

- are apostrophes allowed?

[venta.livejournal.com]

are apostrophes allowed?

Yup. As is arbitrary respacing of the words.

[mr-flay.livejournal.com]

They Damn Ed - punk rockers with a grudge against me.

Adam And The Pants - bouncy pop band renowned for wearing y-fronts

The Cisterns Of Mercy - goth band that performs in public lavatories

Suzanne Vegas - lounge singer