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Well, everyone who was heartily sick of me grumbling about the somewhat uninteresting dilemmas with which last year's desk calendar presented me will be delighted to hear that this year we have... the Forgotten English calendar. Every day I get an outdated word, and some random trivia.

Today's is slightly disappointing - apparently a monkey spoon is a spoon bearing the figure of a monkey. However, yesterday's trivia pleased me muchly.


Tuesday 6th, 1734 marked the death of John Dennis, English playwright and critic. In 1709, he "devised a method of simulating thunder onstage with a large mustard bowl for his dramatic work Appius Virginia."

The play flopped, but he later heard his thunderclaps being used in a production of Macbeth, and apparently exclaimed "See how the rascals use me. They will not let my play run, yet they steal my thunder!"

A quick google suggests that a mustard bowl is... well, a small bowl, to put mustard in. So presumably even a large mustard bowl wouldn't be huge. So how does one make a thunderclap with such a thing ? I guess dropping a metal bowl might suffice, but I'm assuming it was something more complicated than that, or it would hardly have needed someone to "devise" it...

Date: 2004-01-07 01:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nevecat.livejournal.com
I believe thunder effects were done by rolling metal balls down metal chutes/around metal bowls - think of the amount of noise you can get from even one of those small tibetan bowls (can't remember the name) and you get the idea.

Rumbling thunder rather than thunder claps, I would assume.

Date: 2004-01-07 01:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ghoti.livejournal.com
Further to this, I think all the mustard bowls I've seen have a spoon, which sort of pokes out of a hole in the lid. This means that you don't even need to provide extra balls, just use the spoon in a similar rolling manner.

Does that make sense?

Date: 2004-01-07 01:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
Yup, rumbling rather than clapping makes sense.

I'm impressed, though, I've never knowingly seen a mustard bowl. The images google turned up appeared to be unlidded, but I didn't search extensively.

I shall no doubt feel remarkably inferior next time I mix up mustard in an eggcup :)

Date: 2004-01-07 01:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ghoti.livejournal.com
I've only seen them in the sort of programme about antiques that gets shown on lunchtime TV. I generally mix mustard in an egg cup, too...

Date: 2004-01-07 02:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maviscruet.livejournal.com
Thanks for that. I've got the same desk calender but i keep forgetting to bring it in. So I can turn to you for my daily triva dose if I continue to be absent minded

Date: 2004-01-07 02:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
I only remembered today.
Which is better than last year, where my calendar struggled in in April.

Date: 2004-01-07 03:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/elle_/
That's great - you have the best calendar!

I have a Stena Line one in my desk drawer. It says "It's Wednesday. Get on the ferry." (Or words to that effect).

Date: 2004-01-07 03:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wimble.livejournal.com
You mean "It's Wednesday. Drive all the way along the A5, get to Holyhead, get on the ferry, and then wonder how the hell you're going to get back from Ireland in time to see what tomorrow's page says."?

Date: 2004-01-07 03:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sampiano.livejournal.com
Yay! I got the same calender for christmas.

The thing about the monkey spoon (if I remember correctly - it's at home) is that it is a spoon with a monkey on the handle given to the coffin bearers at large funerals... which struck me as somewhat random.

Date: 2004-01-07 03:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
Indeed.

We thought so too, so had a bit of a google, and apparently the tradition also exists in Holland, where the spoons are dished out at weddings/christenings too.

Worse, a special Dutch delicacy served in a moneky spoon - a tot of rum, with a pinch of salt in it. An ideal way to start the morning.

Mind you, according to Brewer:

"Among the Dutch, drinking is called “sucking the monkey” (zuiging de monky), and one fond of drink was called “a monkey sucker.” "

Now that just sounds like something from South Park :)

Date: 2004-01-07 05:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-flay.livejournal.com
Count yourself lucky! From [livejournal.com profile] edling's brother Jim, I got the 2004 Duct Tape calendar - 366 "crazy" ideas for using duct tape inventively. Today's is far too long to write out, but Sunday's read: "Make yourself the ultimate armchair athlete headgear with a little duct tape and a couple of liter [sic] bottles (to be filled with the beverage of your choice)." Naturally this is accompanied by a wacky picture.

Date: 2004-01-07 05:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-flay.livejournal.com
Indded, how Terrence and Phillippe:

"You're a monkey-sucker I must say",
"You sucked your monkey yesterday!"

Date: 2004-01-07 05:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
Indeed :)

Date: 2004-01-07 06:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cuthbertcross.livejournal.com
Hey, at least you got a calendar...
We had to buy one, and the only respectable alternative to the "firemen in bare-chested glory" or the "unbelievably cutsey kitten selecation" was a Muppet Show calendar. OK, not all bad, and it will give [livejournal.com profile] dr_bob a new LJ gif.

Date: 2004-01-07 06:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-flay.livejournal.com
Yes but there's no opportunity to whinge when counting blessings. By definition, really.

Date: 2004-01-07 06:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neilh.livejournal.com
I don't suppose that features any of the uses found by Zodiac Mindwarp and Gimpo, as described in 'Fucked by Rock'?

Date: 2004-01-07 06:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-flay.livejournal.com
We are only seven days into the year, Neil - give it a chance!

Date: 2004-01-07 06:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neilh.livejournal.com
hehehe, true, but I somehow doubt taping underage girls face down to the ground is one of the suggestions.
(you mean you don't spend the first two days of the year reading all the way through to find out what happens next?)

Date: 2004-01-07 06:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mr-flay.livejournal.com
Heh. With the Dlbert calendar, yes. With the Far Side calendar, yes. With the duct tape calendar? Let's be polite and say I've resisted the urge so far....

Date: 2004-01-07 07:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neilh.livejournal.com
Too much excitement all at the same time...

Could be worse - our admin person came through with a wall calendar for us today, except we worked out that we actually don't have any wall to put it on.

Date: 2004-01-07 07:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
(you mean you don't spend the first two days of the year reading all the way through to find out what happens next?)

No! NO! Nononono.

That is very wrong indeed. Looking ahead in calendars is utterly dreaful, besides removing the most enjoyable thing I meet at my desk most mornings (reading the day's entry while my pc wakes up).

Date: 2004-01-07 07:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neilh.livejournal.com
After about the 4th I never use the damned things anyway, they're just more landfill, so I might as well enjoy them while they provide a useful distraction from my family.

Date: 2004-01-07 07:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
Well, I suppose that's fair enough, then.

Date: 2004-01-07 08:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beckyc.livejournal.com
That sounds like the kind of thing that I'd want given to EVERYONE who was at my funeral - would you arrange it for me please?

Not that I'm planning on having a large funeral. Just family and a few close friends y'know ;-)

(I nearly died this morning, so I'm making tasteless jokes today)

Date: 2004-01-07 08:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
I nearly died this morning

You did ? What happened ? Accident or ill-health, and are you OK now ?

I'm with you

Date: 2004-01-07 08:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maviscruet.livejournal.com
Looking ahead on the desk calander is just plain wrong. You get each day as it comes. I used to have to shout at people somewhere I worked to stop them looking.

That's about the only time I can think when I'm more "in it's proper place" then "want it now".

Date: 2004-01-07 09:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beckyc.livejournal.com
Was nearly hit headon by a dustbin lorry as I was cycling to work this morning. Was shaken, but not squished.

Very scary since I was cycling defensively, correctly, visibly etc. Well, it was very scary *anyway*, but YKWIM ;-)

Possibly scarier was the reason why he didn't see* me: apparently it was because his windows were misted over.

*He certainly heard me screaming (which saved me)

Date: 2004-01-07 03:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] venta.livejournal.com
Youch - that sounds awful. And I hope you took his number and reported him for being such a twat as to drive around with windows he couldn't see out of.

*hugs*

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