Auction

[venta]

Today I am wearing my favourite jumper. It is multicoloured and very warm.

However, a colleague has just told me in passing that it makes me look twelve. This isn't a problem, I have ID if required. But...

I figure a jumper which takes 15 years off your age has got to be a saleable commodity. What am I bid ?

Comments

[wimble.livejournal.com]

Can you post a piccy?

[venta.livejournal.com]

Yes. I can.
However, not of the jumper.

(Actually, from past experience, it doesn't photo well and tends to look black in pictures.)

[chrisvenus]

Surely its only saleable if it works universally? You need to perform more tests first. For example, what happens if you put this jumper on a 16 year old? do they really look like a baby who can't walk or talk (apart from mayeb to say "egg"). What about a 14 year old? Do they look like a woman's rather large stomach?

I think more scientific tests are required before you can reasonably suggest it will take 15 years off of anybody's age. :)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Bloody mathematicians, always going for the pathological cases...

[wimble.livejournal.com]

Well, piccies of you as a baby will do then :)

Or some kind of visual description of the jumper.

[chrisvenus]

I've just seen this kind of marketing before...

I was very disappointed that when I bough an all-weather coat that it didn't produce any weather at all, let alone all weathers. Since then I've been very cautious about buying anything without checking the claims out carefully. :)

[venta.livejournal.com]

Very big, very woolly.
Horizontal rows of diamonds, in various very dark reds, greens, blues, browns and greys shading spectrum-wise into each other.

That was an answer to the latter, not a description of me as a baby.

[venta.livejournal.com]

How do you know it didn't produce any weather ? Did you wear it outside ? Was there weather ?

Obviously, EU regulations require such devices to be blocked from operating indoors for safety reasons.

[wimble.livejournal.com]

Very big, very woolly.

not a description of me as a baby.

Of course. That's leathellin.

Call me unobservant, but this most favourite of all your jumpers hasn't made an impression on me. Which seems to belie your favouritism. (Unlike your red fleece, for example, which I have registered).

[mr-flay.livejournal.com]

Why are you trying to sell your favourite jumper?

As to making money from such a wondrous item, you should try replicating it, and then you'd give all those evil cosmetics companies a run for their money...

[venta.livejournal.com]

Well, it has a very high reserve price, I was hoping to make a substantial amount from its sale :) The replication's not a bad idea, though. Show me a business plan and I'll split the profits...

Feeling less homicidal now ?

[mr-flay.livejournal.com]

Business plan:

Steal underpants -> ??? -> Profit.

Still homicidal. Nothing heavy and blunt to hand though.

Bid 1

[condign.livejournal.com]

Three dreams and an 'I love NYC' t-shirt.