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And then I'll kiss your salty lips
Yesterday evening I was sitting on the sea-front at Ramsgate, eating fish and chips. They were pretty good fish and chips, actually. However, the menu bewildered me...
The "sundries" section. Right there. Curry sauce? Fair enough. Mushy peas? Well, I'd rather not but I hear some people like that kind of thing. Pea fritter? You what? I mean, I understand the concept, but since when has that been a thing that you get in a chippy? Pickled onion, fine. Pickled egg, ditto (whatever![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dmh tells you). Pickled... wally?
I'm also faintly alarmed that the curry sauce isn't vegetarian. What's it got in it? I'd have assumed the basic list of flour, water, oil, curry powder and radioactive waste (with local variations to taste).
Oh, and a roll and butter? Not bloody likely. I'm in a chip shop. The sort where you sit down at a formica-topped table and drink tea that dissolves the enamel off your teeth. If I want bread and butter with my meal, I want sliced bread, pre-buttered for me (or possibly even pre-marged) and cut diagonally. I'm not saying that's better, I'm saying that that's what happens in chip shops. This roll nonsense is just messing with the natural order of things[*].
When I first moved to Oxford, I was horrified to discover that the Carfax Chippy - an otherwise decent emporium - didn't serve scraps. And indeed were completely confused when I ordered them (initially as to what it was I wanted, and latterly as to why I wanted such things). Scraps are the drips of batter which have fallen off the fish - basically little blobs of deep-fried batter. No, of course they didn't serve them. They threw them away when they cleared the oil out. They also didn't serve baby's heads.
So, what are your expectations of a good chip shop? Do you expect pea fritters? Would you order a pickled wally? Am I the only person south of Scotch Corner who likes scraps? What can't you get where you now live, that was a stand-by where you grew up?
As a side note, my parents (if not paying proper attention) will inadvertently order "a fish and six". This is, apparently, a fish with 6d-worth of chips. Whether they get a sensible answer depends largely on the age of the person serving. Is anyone else familiar with this?
(A wally, for those who want to know, is a gherkin. I asked on the way out.)
[*] Chip butties are an exception. I'm talking about the bread served with your fish and chips in a sit-down eatery. But even for a chip butty I don't want a roll, I want a flat, soft bread bun or bap. Which may have been what they meant. See also: bread, confusing regional terminology for.
The "sundries" section. Right there. Curry sauce? Fair enough. Mushy peas? Well, I'd rather not but I hear some people like that kind of thing. Pea fritter? You what? I mean, I understand the concept, but since when has that been a thing that you get in a chippy? Pickled onion, fine. Pickled egg, ditto (whatever
dmh tells you). Pickled... wally?I'm also faintly alarmed that the curry sauce isn't vegetarian. What's it got in it? I'd have assumed the basic list of flour, water, oil, curry powder and radioactive waste (with local variations to taste).
Oh, and a roll and butter? Not bloody likely. I'm in a chip shop. The sort where you sit down at a formica-topped table and drink tea that dissolves the enamel off your teeth. If I want bread and butter with my meal, I want sliced bread, pre-buttered for me (or possibly even pre-marged) and cut diagonally. I'm not saying that's better, I'm saying that that's what happens in chip shops. This roll nonsense is just messing with the natural order of things[*].
When I first moved to Oxford, I was horrified to discover that the Carfax Chippy - an otherwise decent emporium - didn't serve scraps. And indeed were completely confused when I ordered them (initially as to what it was I wanted, and latterly as to why I wanted such things). Scraps are the drips of batter which have fallen off the fish - basically little blobs of deep-fried batter. No, of course they didn't serve them. They threw them away when they cleared the oil out. They also didn't serve baby's heads.
So, what are your expectations of a good chip shop? Do you expect pea fritters? Would you order a pickled wally? Am I the only person south of Scotch Corner who likes scraps? What can't you get where you now live, that was a stand-by where you grew up?
As a side note, my parents (if not paying proper attention) will inadvertently order "a fish and six". This is, apparently, a fish with 6d-worth of chips. Whether they get a sensible answer depends largely on the age of the person serving. Is anyone else familiar with this?
(A wally, for those who want to know, is a gherkin. I asked on the way out.)
[*] Chip butties are an exception. I'm talking about the bread served with your fish and chips in a sit-down eatery. But even for a chip butty I don't want a roll, I want a flat, soft bread bun or bap. Which may have been what they meant. See also: bread, confusing regional terminology for.
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Obviously you can have good chips-in-oil, and bad chips-in-lard, but I want carefully controlled identically-processed chips in oil and lard so I can compare. I have no idea how to achieve this :)
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My suspicion would be that chip shops that go out their way to use a cooking fat that's not the default standard also go out their way to cook the things properly - I think that proper temperature control and giving the things enough time are probably more of a factor, at least in terms of not giving pallid greasy squishy things.
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