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People might say that I should strive for more
I was reminded by various comments about navigation on tube lines the other day that I was due a rant about tube lines and their maps.
A month or two ago, I was on a Bakerloo line train, heading (I thought) East from Paddington. I was reading, and looked up to check where I'd got to - and was alarmed to notice that I was proceeding left (=west) along the little 'line only' map stuck on the inside of the carriage.
A brief pause for thought indicated that I was OK, and the map was in fact showing the East-most point of the Bakerloo line on the left. I checked: the line map above my head was orientated similarly, with Harrow & Wealdstone on the right hand side.
Which struck me as exceptionally peverse. Why not show the Harrow on the left, so that West and left coincided ?
I was meeting ChrisC, and had a good old rant about maps when I landed. He suggested that it might be sensible if the line maps were arranged in such a way that the "destination" end of the line map was at the forwards end of the train (ie you progress along the map in the direction of travel, depending on which side you're sitting. I'm not explaining that very well, am I ? Better explanations invited.)
I paid careful attention to Bakerloo line trains after that, and indeed, they do all seem to follow that policy - which is fair enough, though I find it rather confusing and would rather they fixed West (or Westish, depending on line) on the left. Which leaves open the question of whether I was originally on a train which had had one map incorrectly installed, or whether I was Just Wrong.
There's also the issue of things like the Northern line, where I think North should be on the left, but appreciate that others might not agree. I don't remember noticing in the last few months how Northern line maps are organised.
The only one, so far, which has met with my unequivocal approval is the combined line map that hangs out in District/Circle/Hammersmight & City trains - forced into a sensible orientation by the non-linear nature of the Circle line, it has no option but to stick Hammersmith on the far left.
Can anyone who hangs out on tube lines much tell me how the line maps are usually organised ? Have a peek over the next few days, and tell me if they're at least consistent, train to train.
And this is where the post diverges from the sensible. Y'see, it's struck me over the last year or so that each tube line has a very distinct personality. I'm going to try and use line names in this post, but owing to usually identifying them by colour, I may confuse myself. Incidentally, I've discovered that if you are sufficiently determined, you can get Underground staff to explain things to you in terms of "take the Pink Line then change to the Black Line at Kings Cross".
So, the lines. I get on well with the Hammersmith and City line. It's brisk, business like, and gets on with its own job without drawing attention to itself or getting in anyone's way. It's ignored the fashionable end of Paddington, and instead made itself easily accessible. I'm also quite friendly with its work mate, the Bakerloo line. Bakerloo also just gets down to work every morning, and patiently moves people around. As with many things that just function quietly and effectively, these two often get overlooked. I assume they have a quick chat when they meet at Paddington, quietly despairing over the poor service dished out by their fellows.
Far more publicity is dedicated to Central, which bustles self-importantly right through the middle of the City, always terribly busy but somehow never quite managing to get anywhere. Central has a rather higher opinion of itself than is reasonable, and needs taking down a peg or two. There's a suggestion of insanity there, too - no line should run quite so straight through the central zones then go so beserk on the outskirts. Loops, indeed.
Cruising along, confident that it's a little more upmarket than all the others, is the Piccadilly line. People take *me* to get to Knightsbridge, it says, smugly, as it sneers gently at anyone it considers too scruffy to get on its trains. You are invited to admire its slick turning at Heathrow, but expected to politely forget if it unexpectedly abandons you at Acton Town. It is topped only by the Jubilee line, which has ideas way above its station. Particularly since the extension was built, and it has snazzy new sliding doors to show off, and budget space-station decor at some of its stops. These two lines meet, in a rather superior manner, at Green Park, privately enjoying the supercilious joke, of their own tunnel, that no one got.
Carrying on proper, old-fashioned upper class values, we have the District line. The benign uncle of the tube. Despite sharing expensive-side-of-the-Monopoly-board colours with Piccadilly, District isn't above visiting a wide variety of stations, and having numerous branches to cater for its many subjects. Whilst trying to maintain standards, District is aware that it is there to serve the people. Admittedly, it coughs deprecatingly, a somewhat confusing line map is the result of its efforts to please all its customers. Probably best not to mention Earls Court; District gets a bit embarassed about that.
Then there's the awkward half brother, about whom most people are quite unsure. I mean, no one dislikes Victoria, but sometimes they're a little unsure why he's there. He's kind of useful at times, but really, what is this meandering about up-the-middle-and-across-a-bit in aid of ? A sensible line knows where its going, and heads smoothly from one side to the other; none of this shilly-shallying about in zone 2 malarky.
Somewhere out in estranged cousin territory there is the Metropolitan line, which no one seems to quite understand, but which everyone regards with a sort of distant friendliness. If only Metropolitan turned up to more family gatherings, things would probably be better and it'd be included on everyone's Christmas card list. The other lines agree that Metroplotian is a nice chap, but they rarely invite him out for a beer.
Neither, of course, do they invite Circle. Circle lost it years ago, and has just been ambling around talking to himself ever since. Sure, trains still run along the Circle line, but they're fairly random and rather unreliable. Circle, meanwhile, remembers his glory days and carries on around the course, grumbling about lack of respect. Upstarts like Jubilee mutter darkly about 'retirement'.
Always invited, though he rarely attends, is Northern. The patriarch of the underground, the other lines are way too scared to organise drinks without sending an invitation to the Black'un. Because, although Northern has his quirks, and is likeable enough, there's always the slight edge of pyschosis about his stations. No one's ever seen him angry, but then again, no one really wants to; they just don't risk it.
I don't believe I'm acquainted with the remaining lines. Character portraits welcome.
A month or two ago, I was on a Bakerloo line train, heading (I thought) East from Paddington. I was reading, and looked up to check where I'd got to - and was alarmed to notice that I was proceeding left (=west) along the little 'line only' map stuck on the inside of the carriage.
A brief pause for thought indicated that I was OK, and the map was in fact showing the East-most point of the Bakerloo line on the left. I checked: the line map above my head was orientated similarly, with Harrow & Wealdstone on the right hand side.
Which struck me as exceptionally peverse. Why not show the Harrow on the left, so that West and left coincided ?
I was meeting ChrisC, and had a good old rant about maps when I landed. He suggested that it might be sensible if the line maps were arranged in such a way that the "destination" end of the line map was at the forwards end of the train (ie you progress along the map in the direction of travel, depending on which side you're sitting. I'm not explaining that very well, am I ? Better explanations invited.)
I paid careful attention to Bakerloo line trains after that, and indeed, they do all seem to follow that policy - which is fair enough, though I find it rather confusing and would rather they fixed West (or Westish, depending on line) on the left. Which leaves open the question of whether I was originally on a train which had had one map incorrectly installed, or whether I was Just Wrong.
There's also the issue of things like the Northern line, where I think North should be on the left, but appreciate that others might not agree. I don't remember noticing in the last few months how Northern line maps are organised.
The only one, so far, which has met with my unequivocal approval is the combined line map that hangs out in District/Circle/Hammersmight & City trains - forced into a sensible orientation by the non-linear nature of the Circle line, it has no option but to stick Hammersmith on the far left.
Can anyone who hangs out on tube lines much tell me how the line maps are usually organised ? Have a peek over the next few days, and tell me if they're at least consistent, train to train.
And this is where the post diverges from the sensible. Y'see, it's struck me over the last year or so that each tube line has a very distinct personality. I'm going to try and use line names in this post, but owing to usually identifying them by colour, I may confuse myself. Incidentally, I've discovered that if you are sufficiently determined, you can get Underground staff to explain things to you in terms of "take the Pink Line then change to the Black Line at Kings Cross".
So, the lines. I get on well with the Hammersmith and City line. It's brisk, business like, and gets on with its own job without drawing attention to itself or getting in anyone's way. It's ignored the fashionable end of Paddington, and instead made itself easily accessible. I'm also quite friendly with its work mate, the Bakerloo line. Bakerloo also just gets down to work every morning, and patiently moves people around. As with many things that just function quietly and effectively, these two often get overlooked. I assume they have a quick chat when they meet at Paddington, quietly despairing over the poor service dished out by their fellows.
Far more publicity is dedicated to Central, which bustles self-importantly right through the middle of the City, always terribly busy but somehow never quite managing to get anywhere. Central has a rather higher opinion of itself than is reasonable, and needs taking down a peg or two. There's a suggestion of insanity there, too - no line should run quite so straight through the central zones then go so beserk on the outskirts. Loops, indeed.
Cruising along, confident that it's a little more upmarket than all the others, is the Piccadilly line. People take *me* to get to Knightsbridge, it says, smugly, as it sneers gently at anyone it considers too scruffy to get on its trains. You are invited to admire its slick turning at Heathrow, but expected to politely forget if it unexpectedly abandons you at Acton Town. It is topped only by the Jubilee line, which has ideas way above its station. Particularly since the extension was built, and it has snazzy new sliding doors to show off, and budget space-station decor at some of its stops. These two lines meet, in a rather superior manner, at Green Park, privately enjoying the supercilious joke, of their own tunnel, that no one got.
Carrying on proper, old-fashioned upper class values, we have the District line. The benign uncle of the tube. Despite sharing expensive-side-of-the-Monopoly-board colours with Piccadilly, District isn't above visiting a wide variety of stations, and having numerous branches to cater for its many subjects. Whilst trying to maintain standards, District is aware that it is there to serve the people. Admittedly, it coughs deprecatingly, a somewhat confusing line map is the result of its efforts to please all its customers. Probably best not to mention Earls Court; District gets a bit embarassed about that.
Then there's the awkward half brother, about whom most people are quite unsure. I mean, no one dislikes Victoria, but sometimes they're a little unsure why he's there. He's kind of useful at times, but really, what is this meandering about up-the-middle-and-across-a-bit in aid of ? A sensible line knows where its going, and heads smoothly from one side to the other; none of this shilly-shallying about in zone 2 malarky.
Somewhere out in estranged cousin territory there is the Metropolitan line, which no one seems to quite understand, but which everyone regards with a sort of distant friendliness. If only Metropolitan turned up to more family gatherings, things would probably be better and it'd be included on everyone's Christmas card list. The other lines agree that Metroplotian is a nice chap, but they rarely invite him out for a beer.
Neither, of course, do they invite Circle. Circle lost it years ago, and has just been ambling around talking to himself ever since. Sure, trains still run along the Circle line, but they're fairly random and rather unreliable. Circle, meanwhile, remembers his glory days and carries on around the course, grumbling about lack of respect. Upstarts like Jubilee mutter darkly about 'retirement'.
Always invited, though he rarely attends, is Northern. The patriarch of the underground, the other lines are way too scared to organise drinks without sending an invitation to the Black'un. Because, although Northern has his quirks, and is likeable enough, there's always the slight edge of pyschosis about his stations. No one's ever seen him angry, but then again, no one really wants to; they just don't risk it.
I don't believe I'm acquainted with the remaining lines. Character portraits welcome.
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And, yes, I'm with you on the west=left being a good idea. But I do tend to scan the map in both directions just to be sure.
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Best not to mention that. More than a few 'incidents at King's Cross' have been caused by remarks of that nature.
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The DLR: a teenaged girl in a fluffy sweater who spends much of her time in her room, singing about tall ships and castles and drifting through life minding her own business. When called upon to do something she either does it perfectly, or is exasperatingly late.
The East London line: Hopeful hanger-on of the Jubilee line, Robin to its Batman, Parker to its Lady Penelope. When left alone, mutters darkly about fish traps and poaching wildfowl, then pops out next to the local library with a cheery innocent grin and an "Aw'right, guv'nor?"
These are not nearly as good as yours!
Victoria the social worker
Then she got a bit distracted, she went south of the river and seemd to like the rougher side of things. She told her parents she was stopping in Pimlico, being cultured at the Tate, but that was merely a ruse and she kept on going south to Stockwell and Brixton. Similarly in the north initial trips to Islington were little more than scouting and cover for trips to Walthamstow and Seven Sisters (as well as allowing for a certain interest in North London football at Seven Sisters and Tottenham Hale).
Since the unfortunate incidents in the early 80s, Victoria has been unable to hide her daliances from the rest of the family, but she has been able to find a new vocation as a social worker, allowing people from various communities to integrate with the rest of London.
directional maps
"It's only possible for lines where the trains never get turned round and
where all the line diagrams are on the sides of the cars. I think that's
the Jubilee, Victoria, Bakerloo and Waterloo & City. Not sure if the maps
on all four lines are arranged like this. Jubilee and Victoria definitely
are."
(The Metropolitan and East London lines, which use the same rolling stock, have line diagrams in the centre of the carriages.)
The same thread suggests that some people find it confusing to have maps in different orientations on opposite sides of the carriage. I agree with you, though.
Re: directional maps
I think my problem is just that when I'm on the tube, I don't have much sense of which way it's going. Hopefully, I know where I'm heading, but whether the train is going to my left or to my right isn't really something I register as relevant.
North London Line
Someone keeps trying to airbrush him out of the family photos. No one else objects.
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Not that I have any problem with any of the things you have written about it above as a result, apart from perhaps the 'ideas above its station (boom-boom)' bit. Of course it is snazzy, supercilious and generally downright posh. Hoorah!
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What matters to me is that each individual line or subsection of line should only ever be depicted on these maps in one way. Of course, if that one way happens to be West on the left for E/W lines then everyone's happy !
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You think it should be North <-> Right, or you don't think there's a "correct" way round ? (Or something else ?)
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It's basically Pulp, but an underground line.
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OTOH, this LJ entry falls into the category of entries which directly ask the readership to contribute (and implicitly request a particular style of comment). As such, comments in keeping with the theme get marginally marked down for the purposes of awards. After all, the committee wishes to promote and advance the art of commentage generally, not just in the kinds of contexts which get double-digit comment counts already.
FWIW, 85% of the shortlisted comments so far have been by
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